MEMOIRS OF PISCES (Episode 11)

ANNIE

Annie still couldn't believe that she had finally gotten a job in Lagos. The once monstrous city had suddenly decided to be nice to her. Her parents were ecstatic when she called to inform them. Terry was indifferent and had gone on a motivational lecture on why she should continue stripping. He had made her see the difficulties she would continually face in terms of distance between her office and her home. She understood that problem quite alright and for the past three weeks, she has been struggling with waking up by 5 am, leaving the house by 6 am and resuming work by 8 am. Her Boss; Mr. Daren had told her that some days, she would be required to resume by 7:30 am and that had made her panic because they shared the same office space on the top floor of the building. The office was designed in such a way that Mr. Daren was in another inner office while she was positioned outside the main area. Neka's office was just the next door leaving both of them as the only occupants of that space unlike the other departments of the company that shared open spaces on each floor of the two storey building. This meant that she had to be on seat before he resumed work.

But she wasn't really worried, her salary was a consolation. Although, she always got home late, she was okay with the terms of the company which required her to undergo a three months probation first before she would be made a full staff. Her salary for the first three months would be eighty thousand Naira monthly then, if she was fully absorbed into the system, it would be increased to the actual amount she was due. She would also be entitled to other fringe benefits which the HR would disclose after the end of the three months probation. She loved their offer and was determined to work hard to become a full staff.

So, out of excitement, she had told her neighbor, Mama David. The mother of five had created an uproar in the compound as she ran out of Annie's room where she had gone to borrow matches and started shouting with joy to anyone who cared to listen that Annie had finally gotten a job as "second in command" on the "Island". The whole "compound" had been instantly filled with shouts of joy and songs of thanks as neighbors either left their soups on their kerosene stove or stuck their heads out of their one room apartments to join in the celebration.  Bros Zik had bought small stout for all the women and Star beer for the men. For them, it was a thing of achievement for an Ajegunle person to get a job with one of those "high flying" companies on the Island.

Annie had been embarrassed with joy. She had thought to herself, "look at these people, they don't even know me that well, yet, my joy is their joy". She had been overwhelmed with love and despite the fact that she nursed a deep resentment for her environment, she was thankful for the not so perfect people she had as neighbors.

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Every morning posed to be the most mischievous. You never knew what awaited you on the highway. The wahala from all the mean yellow colored "danfo" buses always left you exhausted by the time you got to the office. The conductors were ruthless with their words and their curses when they found out that you didn't have "change" that early morning, could mar your entire day. So Annie made it a point of duty to always buy something from her neighbors who traded corn and fruits in front of the compound so that she could have change for the early morning rush.

On this particular Friday morning, she left her home by 5:45 am and was lucky to get to the office by exactly 7:30 am. She was happy she had taken that risk to have left home earlier than 6 am as usual. So as she got into the spacious office, the first thing on her mind was to sleep.

..............................

She tried opening her eyes but the sleep was just too sweet to let go. Then as she grew into consciousness, she felt another presence. Gradually, her senses awoke to reality and she perceived the familiar scent of  Hugo Boss which she had come to appreciate since the past three weeks but then, she knew she wasn't dreaming. Mr. Daren was around. She quickly opened her eyes and sat up to adjust the strands of her carefully wrapped natural hair but she saw him standing and watching her. She was shocked and ashamed and confused. She quickly glanced at the wall clock and realized that it was only 8 am on the dot. She noticed that he was still standing there so she greeted him as calmly as she could.

"Good morning Sir. I'm sorry I slept off"

He had a slight frown on his fore head as he studied her but he replied;

"Good morning Annie. Long night again?"
"Not really Sir. I got home late as usual" she answered then she quickly added, "but it's fine. I'm not complaining"

He nodded and turned to go into his office then as if remembering something, paused and called over his shoulder, "please come in for a sec"

...................................

Annie sat in front of her Boss and as usual, he took his time attending to some urgent emails before turning his attention to her.

"What time do you get home?" he asked
"9 pm Sir"
"Certainly that's really late?" he said with a raised eyebrow
"Honestly Sir, I'm fine. I just had to sleep today cos I got here by 7:30"
"Alright then. Let me know if you need anything" he said and together, they went through his itinerary for the day.

................................

Annie was worried. This was the third time Mr. Daren had caught her sleeping in the morning. The first time had been the very first day she had resumed work. She had left the house by 5:30 am , gotten to work by 6: 30 am and had slept till 8 am only because he had woken her up himself. Ever since, she had resolved to find a balance in time management. Now, he had caught her again. So during lunch, she had called Terry for a brief chat cos there was always a rush hour on Fridays. He had agreed and had promised to pick her up after work.

She was surprised at his eagerness to see her and suspected that there was something fishy about his eagerness but then, she ignored the nudge. Terry's always been extra, she mused to herself.

MEMOIRS OF PISCES (Episode 10)

DAREN

Daren got to the office by 10 am all the while regretting his decision of not accepting the official driver his Mom had assigned to him. He had had little sleep at night going through the resumes' and it hadn't been an easy feat because, his body had been weak but his mind kept urging him on. So when he entered the lobby he wasn't really surprised when he saw the applicants already seated in the second conference room with papers in their hands. His secretary saw him and rushed over to get his laptop bag. When he got  to his office he asked her,

"Neka, what's with the papers?" he asked referring to the papers he had seen with the applicants

Neka who's always business like and rarely smiles answered in her usual strict manner, "Sir, that's just a brief personality test Mrs. Danjuma instructed we administer to them"

Daren rolled his eyes before asking, "But I thought this was part of the previous process?"

Neka shifted uncomfortably. She always found herself caught in between this mother and son's decision making process and it wasn't always pleasant. She cleared her throat before responding.

"Well Sir, I had three personality tests before I was employed here. It's just part of the security measures we take here to ensure our staff is sane enough for the job"

Daren accepted that and then instructed her to send in the applicants one after the other for the interview when they were through with the test.

.................................

Daren drilled the applicants with questions. He wanted to ensure that whoever would end up being his personal assistant will not only be loyal to the company but most importantly will become his business confidante. He wanted someone that would answer to him instead of his Mom. He wanted someone that could put in extra hours and wouldn't mind travelling with him whenever he wanted. Preferably, he wanted a male personal assistant. Women were too complicated and emotional and having to deal with their universal drama as well as their hormonal shifts was the last thing on his mind so he found himself hoping he could get a male PA after this whole stress.

..............................

There were fifteen young men and four ladies. Eight of those men were married with kids and over thirty five while the rest were single and in their twenties and thirties. The ladies on the other hand were single. Thus the interview was intense and at some point, he wished that he could employ all of them but he only had to choose one. Then he noticed that one was missing. A female. He picked up her resume and scanned through it again. Then he did something out of the norm; he picked up his phone and dialed the number on the resume. It rang three times before she picked.

"Hello?" Daren said in his most professional voice
"Hello! Hello! Good morning! Please kindly call back. I can't talk right now. I'm on a bike" she was breathless
Daren was taken aback but he went ahead to say, " Well Miss Annie, you need to get here as soon as you can. I won't wait forever to interview you. Where are you at the moment?"
"Jesus! I'm sorry Sir. I had no idea. I'm approaching the Lekki Toll Gate now, I'll be there in 10 minutes. I'm so sorry Sir." she sounded far away
"Ok" Daren said and then hung up.

He was amused and furious at the same time because he couldn't understand why someone who's looking for a job could utterly lack seriousness. Why would she be on a bike by 11 am for an interview that was scheduled for 9 am? Out of curiosity, he picked up her resume again and checked her address to see where she lived. It was pointless because, even if he was able to use Google map to find her address, he had no idea where it was. So he decided to wait. For him, she had failed her own personality test.

.............................

At exactly 12 noon, Neka called Daren to inform him that the last applicant was around. Daren who was deeply engrossed in his work simply grunted. Almost immediately, the door opened and a breathless young woman walked in. Daren without looking up from his laptop signaled her to sit. He could hear her breathing even if she tried controlling it and it sort of distracted him from the figures he was studying. He sighed and paused on his work to attend to the late comer.

He looked up and found her staring at him then she started speaking immediately,

"Good morning Sir. I'm really sorry. I got stuck in traffic and I had to use a bike. I didn't know you were the one calling. I'm so sorry" she said all at once

Daren was studying her. She had on a white long sleeved chiffon shirt, her long black hair was pulled back in a neat pony tail, her face was bare off makeup but she had on a transparent gloss that gave her stressed oval shaped face a little lift. Something about her aura appealed to his senses and he felt his initial irritation at her lateness wear off. She sounded ruffled and unsettled but she looked calm. Then he cleared his throat before speaking.

"Where do you live Annie?"
"On the mainland Sir. Ajegunle precisely" she answered
"How did you get stuck in traffic? I believe that if this interview was important to you, you would have left home earlier"
"I did leave the house early Sir but there was an accident on the third mainland bridge which caused the traffic so I had to take a bike all the way."

Daren frowned at that. He had no idea where the Mainland was. He had never been there. He didn't even know about the third Mainland Bridge. So he shrugged it off and continued his questions.

"How would you cope with the traffic when you get this job?"
"It won't be a problem Sir. I can handle it" she answered now looking nervous

Daren paused. He narrowed his eyes and asked her the ultimate question he had also asked the other applicants.

"I believe you've met my Mom; Mrs. Danjuma. She also runs this company. What would you do if she asked you to keep tabs on me and report to her daily?"

She adjusted herself nervously on her seat before answering "I believe my loyalty is to you just as your loyalty is to her Sir. My JD is centered around confidentiality and I wouldn't compromise on that. Not even for your Mom except you say so Sir. Thus, I wouldn't keep tabs on you if your Mom instructed me to"

Daren was impressed and sort of amused because she had a blank expression on her face as she spoke. Then he asked the final question.

"If I wanted you to travel with me occasionally, unannounced, would you do it even if your spouse disagreed?"

"I'm under no obligation to anyone at the moment Sir. Thus, I'm ready to go wherever my job takes me." she answered and exhaled slowly as if she had been holding her breath all along.

Daren was intrigued. The other applicants had been scared to answer the question about his Mom but this girl had guts and that was exactly what he needed. He looked her over for the last time and then he surprised himself when he said;

"When can you start?"

MEMOIRS OF PISCES (episode 8)

DAREN

Monday had started out brutal for Daren and as he kept staring at the pile of files on his table, he concluded that he would break down if he continued receiving more stress punches. The files were much and each needed the same level of urgency as the other. He had passed them on to his secretary to attend to but she had been too preoccupied with other tasks he had assigned to her that she forgot to attend to them. He had a lot on his plate as well being that it was the season of accounts reconciliation for most of their top clients. He had to do the final vetting according to his company's policy before the final results were delivered to their clients. He checked his watch; it was almost time for lunch with his Mom so he hibernated his computer, took his car keys, his phone and his tablet before leaving. Mom was a time keeper. A minute's delay could tick her off and she would start calling his phone non stop.

..........................

As he drove, he recalled the events of two weeks back. The place, the scene, the sound, the people, the costumes, the ambiance, that girl..., that shy, unsure stripper with skin like caramel and slightly parted lips panting slowly with every move she made. The scent of her skin when she ...  The view of Marcopolo drew him out of his reverie. He drove into the spacious compound and saw Mom's car with the driver napping inside. He smiled at the sight as he walked into the Nigerian version of a Chinese restaurant. When Mom had told him about the place, he had laughed at the thought of what a Chinese restaurant would look like in Lagos but  looking at this one now, he was impressed. Though, very spacious, the Decor of gold mixed with red gave the place that Chinese feel except for the fact that there was no Chinese song playing in the background so he was still conscious of being in Lagos.

He saw Mom sitting pretty and straight like a Queen at their table. She was looking out to the water front through the full length glass windows beside their table. Daren smiled fondly. This woman; this beautiful 60 year old Hausa woman with the body of a 40 year old and the mind of a 25 year old, this strong woman was a rare gem. To people; she was cold and unfriendly but to him she was everything he could ever wish for in a mother. She was warm, strict to a fault but overly caring. Although sometimes, she put up the front of an overbearing slave master to their staff, he knew it was all an act to curtail any form of insubordination. He loved her and respected her decisions especially those she made for their family and even when she was the third out of three wives she had the reigns to her husband's businesses.

Daren laughed this time when she turned and saw him. She stretched out her hand to him and when he took it, she gave him that heart warming smile that always made her look more youthful.

........................

They ordered for long bean noodles, prawns and some side dishes to go with. As they ate, they talked about the business. Then Daren recalled he had asked for an assistant before arriving Nigeria so he reminded her.

"Don't tell me that Lagos's short of hard working youths who aren't competent enough to be my assistant Mom"
She took her time to chew before responding. "Well, you never can tell unless you test them. We actually had quite a number of interviews the month before you arrived but we weren't satisfied with the candidates"
"How many were they?" Daren asked
"About a hundred or more"
Daren sighed. Dear mother, always hard to please. He shook his head in amusement before saying;
"Okay, ask the HR manager to send me the CVs of the top twenty. I'll look through myself and call for another interview."
"Don't worry son, we'll handle it" she said in her conclusive tone before sipping some water but Daren wouldn't let it slip so he insisted.
"No Mom. I'm being swallowed by work and I need an assistant ASAP"
She sighed in defeat cos she knew her son. He could go ahead and call for the interviews without her anyways. He was just as stubborn as she was so she decided on compromise.
"Alright. We'll do it this way. We'll call the top twenty this Friday and then you'll be a part of the selection committee so that you can decide for yourself. But I must warn you, you won't be so much impressed."

Daren rolled his eyes and said; "At this point, I'll take that chance. Tomorrow it will be. John should send me the CVs at the close of work today, I'll look at them overnight, the candidates will be notified tomorrow and the interview will take place on Wednesday. By Friday I want an assistant so I can live long. That's final Mom. Now let's talk about something else"

She looked at him narrow eyed and they both burst into laughter at the same time. She threw the napkin at him before saying, "If you aren't so strong headed then I'll conclude that you aren't my son"

Daren winked at her.

MEMOIRS OF PISCES (episode 6)

DAREN

The night was still young according to Femi's mental clock. Though it was already 12:00 midnight, Femi insisted that, that was the time for the fun to begin. He had given Daren a head's up that 12 midnight was when the real fun seekers of Lagos came out. From Daren's office, they had gone to Craft Gourmet for dinner, NOK for drinks and then Silver Fox for the peak of the night.

As they drove to Silver Fox, Daren tried to visualize what it would look like in his mind but he couldn't. He had been to strip clubs in England and other cities around the world he had traveled to but it had been the same experience. The pretty girls, getting naked, acting all coy and dancing seductively, smiling invitingly, and baring it all on the pole, he had seen it all. He wanted to see something different, something fresh, something unexpected and different from the norm and he hoped he could see it tonight. So as they got to the gate, he noticed that the security men recognized Femi immediately from the way they greeted him. Femi had already made reservations so even when they got in and the place was crowded, they had their special table ready.

......................

Daren fed his eyes. He was impressed and amazed that such a place existed in Lagos, Nigeria. The girls were all beautiful and well sculpted. They had on sexy lingeries and really high heels; the famous stripper's heels that looked like mobile platforms that helped them find their balance when they walked. He liked the way they came to pay their respects to Femi and him in the famous stripper way. Every stripper is supposed to formally greet every guest with a smile and a handshake that stopped at the tip of the fingers. It was a flirty greeting that expressed that desire to give you a lap dance and also keep your table company all through the evening. So when they came to Daren and Femi's table, Daren noticed that they smelled really nice and clean which was key for him. So he relaxed, sipping his drink and taking in the whole scenario.

He noticed that the dance stage for the strippers was round and almost split in two so there were two separate poles for them to dance. The strippers were graceful on the pole and their skill was almost like those of the strippers abroad but somehow, it felt so unreal. It felt like they were trying too hard to be sexy and foreign. He sighed and asked Femi,
"When will our people learn to be original?"
Femi who was obviously enjoying himself looked at Daren like he was weird before replying,
"I don't understand Man. What do you mean?"
Daren took a sip of his drink before answering.
"Well,  I wasn't expecting so much twerking. I don't know. I just feel like I'm seeing the same thing I've seen before"
Femi rolled his eyes. Since Daren returned from England, he had become very difficult to please. He was always looking for the "original" in everything. So, he simply patted Daren on the back and said,
"Just enjoy the moment man! Just loosen up and enjoy the moment! Trust me, you won't be disappointed anymore than you are now.

Daren shrugged slightly and hoped to enjoy the evening. He wasn't feeling the whole display of nakedness. They're good no doubt but, he just wasn't feeling the part where they opened their veevee completely for everyone to see what's in there. It's supposed to be a "strip" club not a "hurry to show off your veevee club". He felt like the girls were too in a hurry to show what was down there instead of taking their time to tease the customers, make them want more before going for the kill. His craving was wearing out and he wasn't in the mood anymore so he switched his attention to his phone, with the loud erotic music teasing his mind and his senses.

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Daren was fiddling with his phone at about 1:30am. He had fed his eyes with everything around him and it was still a case of the same ol' same ol'. Though the music was great, he enjoyed the music more than the lap dances so he rejected any that was offered. Femi had even tried bringing the prettiest girl to him for a lap dance but he had declined then Femi excused himself and when he returned, he asked Daren to follow him to another section of the club.

There was a private room upstairs and Femi had paid for one and had asked the manager of the place to make Daren "Happy". Daren had found it funny but he relaxed in the room anyways; happy to be away from all that unrealness to waiting for whatever surprise they had in store for him.

He waited ten minutes in the dimly lit room in sky blue, the ambiance was just right and there was slow music playing in the background. There was a single white vanity chair in the middle of the room and as he waited for whatever it was that would make him happy, he heard the door open slowly. Someone walked in. A girl. She had on just a simple black outfit; a black lacy lingerie with net sheer tights. She didn't wear the regular stripper heels but she wore a face mask that concealed just her eyes but Daren could see her lips. They were small without lipstick but just gloss. Her hair was packed up in a ponytail and she had on black lacy gloves. She wasn't light skinned; she was chocolate and lithe as a gazelle. When she walked, she wasn't in a hurry, she walked slowly, almost afraid for her tiny feet to touch the plush rug on the floor and then gently, she sat on the lone chair in the middle of the room. Daren was intrigued and so he waited to see what would happen next.

MEMOIRS OF PISCES (episode 4)

DAREN

This Friday made it a month since Daren has been in Nigeria and it has been a sour experience for him. First, his Mom was always hovering. She had refused to employ a live in Help to tend to the house and had instead gone into contract with a cleaning agency to do the job. Then for food, she ensured her own cook stocked his fridge with fresh food everyday. Her reasons were, she didn't trust these Lagos Helps who in most cases, became their bosses mistress. Some of them eventually became the madame of the manor and for her, that was completely unacceptable. This school of thought really upset Daren but he had to accept his Mom's judgement. After all, she had more experience in such matters and has lived in Nigeria far longer than him.

He hadn't even had time to explore Lagos as much as he wanted because, Mom kept organizing a welcome home party every weekend. The parties which were more like a networking summit always had in attendance prestigious personalities, top CEOs and representatives of world class organizations who were very excited at the prospect of working with the just returned son of one of the strongest female business mogul in Nigeria, Mrs. Danjuma.

Although, he had resumed work immediately he had settled in against the insistence of his Mom for him to take time off, he really wanted to see how the company was faring. His Dad had started the company years back and had found interest in other ventures thus leaving the company under the care of his Mom and him. Mom had done a great job overseeing all affairs which yielded remarkable growth while he on the other hand had stayed back in England, referring and investing in more businesses. Now, she wants to retire and had demanded that he returned home to take full charge of the business. He wasn't ready to relocate but he badly needed to leave England so he obliged her.

At 40, he was still single and wasn't looking forward to settling down anytime soon. He loved and valued his solitude cos it gave him enough time to be; just to be. Yes, his culture required him to have been married with kids already but he wasn't a man of the conventional. His idiosyncrasy followed no rules. He usually thought of himself as a free soul and wouldn't subject himself to a way of life that boxed his thoughts. So, he took the growth of his company more serious than growing a relationship that would lead to marriage.

For weeks, he had been looking forward to having a taste of the upbeat lifestyle of Lagos since Femi had always made it a point of duty to feed him with his night time escapades whenever he visited England and he had thought of trying out one or two things he had learnt from their conversations but now, it looked like his Mom had taken over his weekends. He had to look for another way out.

........................

Femi picked on the first ring and this made Daren smile.
"What's up Buddy!" Femi exclaimed
"Hey Flash! what you been up to?" Daren teased knowingly.  They both laughed cos they both understood that question.

Femi knew happening spots in Lagos and even though he was married with two kids, he never failed to keep his Friday dates with at least 3 bars in VI Lagos after work before going home. Thus, his friends called him "Flash".

Femi answered "I'm packing up to leave the office now. What about you?"
"Been done since 6. Just decided to stay here for a bit before going back to that depressing zone if you know what I mean" Daren said
Femi laughed "I totally understand man. I'm sorry to say but your Mom is a pain in the ass. Jeez! How do you cope?"
Daren laughed as he replied, "Hey, don't hate. She's still my jewel. Anyways, I feel like going out tonight and I'll need you to be my Chaperon. Are you game?"
"Of course! Yes Man! I can't wait to spoil you silly my friend! You know what, I'm coming to get you" he chattered excitedly
"Alright. I'm here"

Daren smiled at the thought of what was to come. He knew he was in for an interesting evening but the details of it wasn't something he coul predict. Anyways, he was ready for anything.

MEMOIRS OF PISCES (episode 2)

DAREN 

Daren was already exhausted by the time he got home. He didn't find the experience at the airport funny at all; although, he had been given a heads up by his friend, Femi. The moment he had arrived at the MMIA, he had received the warmest and most sycophantic welcome ever. The attendants at the airport were so friendly and helpful that he had fallen completely for their over resourcefulness. Everyone wanted to be of help to him and try as he might to assure them that he could manage his luggage, they insisted. By the time he was cleared, he had spent over twenty thousand Naira out of the money he could manage to change, on "settling" everyone that "helped" him. He had been washed with relief when he had finally sighted his good friend, Femi.

Now, as they drove through the streets of Lagos catching up on old times, he couldn't help but marvel at how things had changed. Everywhere looked so beautiful. Not particularly spic and span but really different from the Lagos he had left fifteen years ago as a teenager.

By the time they drove into Lekki, he was amazed. Femi noticed the look on his face and laughed. He was more impressed when they finally got to the house that his Mom had prepared for him. She knew he liked white and thus ensured that the house was white in every way possible; just like the one he had left in England. He didn't like it; yes he was impressed but he didn't like it. It looked too fake; almost like the architect wanted to clone his house back home.  He looked at Femi and frowned. Femi knew that look and immediately went defensive,

"Come on Buddy, tell me you love this place. It took us a lot of time and effort to get this one for you"
"Well, not really but it'll do for a week at least and then I'll move out" Daren replied in his rich British accent while still looking around
"A week?!" Femi exclaimed trying to hold in his laughter before continuing. "Daren, your Mom has paid for this place, two years in advance. She totally loves it and feels it'll be like home away from home" he paused to see if that would have any effect on Daren.

Daren wasn't surprised but he was upset that as usual, his Mom has had her way again. He sighed and asked,
"How many rooms are there?"
"Three rooms" Femi answered
"Alright" he shrugged  and followed Femi as he gave him a tour of the house.

............................

It was a three bedroom serviced apartment with a gym, a pool side and a view of the Ikoyi link Bridge. It was tastefully furnished and the furniture was completely French. Everything had Mom's name written all over it and though, the house looked sophisticated with a great view, he still didn't like it. It reminded him of England which has no place in his reveries yet but still he would have to learn to like the house if he was going to live in it for two years.

..............................

The door bell rang and without waiting for a response, the visitor opened the door and walked in with sure unhurried steps. Daren rolled his eyes and smiling fondly, he went to the living room to meet the only woman he could never argue with. Mom.